Saturday, December 14, 2013

Week 102 - "Here Comes Santa Claus (The Even More Theologically Confused Version)"

This is a parody of the Gene Autry and Oakley Haldeman classic song.  I wrote this because I have always found the original song to be kind of a bizarre mish-mash of religious beliefs and fairy stories.  Please know that this is in good fun and not meant to be preachy or judgmental.

V. 1
"Here Comes Santa Claus," "Here Comes Santa Claus" is the strangest song.
Praying to the Lord about a fictional character somehow just seems wrong.
I don't think this song is really quite theologically sound.
But say your prayers to Frosty the Snowman when Santa Claus comes to town.

V. 2
Here comes Santa Claus, Here comes Santa Claus and he's got his list.
With divine omniscience he rules Christmas with an iron fist.
Santa knows your secret sins and rains down his vengeance with coal.
On your knees, and beg that Santa has mercy on your mortal soul.

V. 3
Here comes Santa Claus, Here comes Santa Claus. Watch where he goes next.
And, yeah, it kind of matters if you're rich or poor, 'cause there ain't no chimneys in the projects.
Rich kids always get better presents, that much is perfectly clear.
Pray to the Ghost of Christmas Future that you'll do better next year.

V. 4
Here comes Santa Claus, Here Comes Santa, are you getting any of this?
Christmas time is such a mish-mash of conflicting myths.
But if you feel mixing your beliefs with fairy tales is alright,
Then pray to the elves and the holy reindeer 'cause Santa Claus comes tonight.

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