Saturday, July 27, 2013

Week 82 - "27 Parts in the Show"

A semi-autobiographical song for the new musical.  I was never the star of a musical, but I was in the lead for the largest number of character parts.


Lyrics:

I MAY NOT BE THE STAR
I DON’T DRIVE A FANCY CAR
BUT I’VE PLAYED MORE PARTS THAT ANY OTHER ACTOR IN HISTORY SO FAR

V.1
IT ALL BEGINS IN ACT ONE, WHERE I HAVE LOTS OF FUN
PLAYING DANCER THREE, HEY, LOOK AT ME
MEMORIZE THAT FACE, BECAUSE YOU’LL HAVE TO PLACE IT
WHEN YOU SEE ME IN MY OTHER TWENTY-SIX PARTS IN THE SHOW

ch.1
I AM PLAYING TWENTY-SEVEN PARTS IN THE SHOW
AT LEAST THAT’S WHAT I’VE COUNTED OUT SO FAR
I’M NOT A SHINING STAR
I’M NO ONE YOU SHOULD KNOW
BUT I’M THE ONLY PERSON PLAYING TWENTY-SEVEN PARTS IN THE SHOW!

v.2
IN THE SECOND SCENE I HAVE FIVE SECONDS TO CHANGE
ALL MY CLOTHES DOWN TO MY UNDERWEAR
IT ISN’T VERY FUN, BUT SOMEHOW IT GETS DONE
WHEN YOU HAVE THIS MUCH EXPERIENCE AS EXTRAS IN THE SHOW

ch.2
I AM PLAYING TWENTY-SEVEN PARTS IN THE SHOW
UNTIL THE REWRITES COME AND I HAVE MORE.
MY JOB IS NOT A BORE.
I’M ALWAYS ON THE GO,
AND I’M THE ONLY PERSON PLAYING TWENTY-SEVEN PARTS IN THE SHOW!

fast intro.
ONCE I DID DREAM OF PLAYING LEAD
BUT IT SEEMS THAT I'M JUST NOT THAT BREED
IT TURNS THAT MY TALENT LIES IN CHANGING CHARACTERS WITH BLINDING SPEED

ch.3
I AM PLAYING TWENTY-SEVEN PARTS IN THE SHOW
I KNOW YOU THINK THAT I EXAGGERATE
BUT YOU DON'T HAVE TO WAIT
FOR OP'NING NIGHT TO KNOW
THAT I'M THE ONLY PERSON PLAYING TWENTY-SEVEN PARTS IN THE SHOW!

spoken: No, you don't have to wait, because here's the full list:

After dancer three, I play the man in the crowd with the bowler hat,
and shortly after that, I appear as the elderly gentleman with a cat,
And then I'm back as the banker, a then middle-aged accountant who's getting fat,
And then as a cop, then a man in a shop, then a young man carrying a baseball bat.

I'm the barber, I'm the waiter, I'm the surley bartender,
I'm the preacher, I'm the farmer, I'm the hot dog vendor
I'm the plumber, I'm the tailor, I'm the train engineer,
I'm the drummer, I'm the sailor, I'm the strange auctioneer.

I'm a winner, I'm a loser, I'm a mover, and a shaker,
I'm the butcher, the baker, and the candlestick maker.

And if that does not impress you
Then nothing will that I know
'Cause I'm the only person playing 27 parts in the show!

Saturday, July 20, 2013

Week 81 - "Secondhand Smoke"

Having smoke blown in my face is a pet peeve of mine.


Lyrics:

v. 1

Eb5 Db5 Ab5
Big man
with the game plan
Always got to have
A cigarette in your hand.
Ab5 Gb5 Db5
Too cool
for school
Eb5 Db5 Ab5
Always cough and hack
And looking like a fool.
Gb
You ask me what's my problem and I don't know how to answer
Ab                                                      Bb
Maybe I don't care for you to share your lung cancer with me.

Eb5 Db5 Ab5

v.2
At your place,
It's your space.
It's still pretty rude,
Blowing smoke in my face.
You don't think
A single wink
You don't realize
How much it makes you stink.
You think I'm acting prissy and you say to stop my chatter,
Maybe you will never get it ever why it matters to me.

Chorus:
Eb5 Gb5 Ab5
I can't stand your secondhand smoke.
It really makes me want to choke.
You know, this really is no joke.
Db5                                        Eb5
Someday it's gonna make you croak.

v. 3
Nicotine
You're never clean.
The smell is in your hair.
And even on your jeans.
Your bloodshot eyes
Are no surprise.
I hope you give it up.
Someday when you get wise.
You ask me what's my problem and I don't know how to answer
Maybe I don't care for you to share your lung cancer with me.

Saturday, July 13, 2013

Week 80 - "Kentaco Hut"

This song celebrates the diversity of fast food found in combination KFC/Taco Bell/Pizza Hut restaurants.


Lyrics:

Intro - E  D  E  A  E  D  E  A

v.1
E                       D
This little town has at least three Mickey D's
E                    A
A Wendy's and Burger King
E                        D
Whatever you're craving, surely you will find.
E                       A
We've got some of everything.
G                                           A
We have Hardee's but perhaps you know it as Carl's Junior.
G                                                       B
Isn't fastfood awesome 'cause it means that you can eat sooner?

v.2
E                  D
Some many choices, it's hard to decide.
E                       A
Sometimes it just is no fun.
E                      D
What if you're craving lots of different things?
E                              A
Why should you settle just for one?
G                                                               A
There's a special place where you can go when you don't what to do
G                                                               B
They've got pizza, Tex/Mex, and fried chicken waiting there for you.

Ch.
E  B/D#  C#m  B  A  B
Oh Kentaco Hut's the place to be.
Oh Kentaco Hut was made for me.
A                  B
Where else can you go?
            G#m                         A
When you're craving fried chicken and a taco
    F#m               B
And pizza at the same time?

Intro - E  D  E  A  E  D  E  A

V. 3
E                        D
You can mix and match as you may please.
E                       A
The choice is all up to you.
E                        D
Dip your crunchy taco in gravy
E                             A
Put fire sauce on your pizza, too.
G                                                        A
Wrapper your crispy chicken in slice of pepperoni if you dare.
G                                                    B
There's no limit to the combinations waiting for you there.

Ch.
E  B/D#  C#m  B  A  B
Oh Kentaco Hut's the place to be.
Oh Kentaco Hut was made for me.
A                  B
Where else can you go?
            G#m                         A
When you're craving fried chicken and a taco
    F#m               B
And pizza at the same time? There's only one place that I know.

Saturday, July 6, 2013

Week 79 - "Hump Day"

The video contains clips from "Lawrence of Arabia" (copyright Columbia Pictures) and the Geico hump day camel commercial (copyright Geico).  The song is by Samuel Stokes.


Lyrics:
A F G E
Hump day
It ain't just any other slump day.
There ain't no other day like Wednesday.
And they can't take it away.
Until the clock strikes midnight on Thursday, yeah.

V. 1
3X A7 Eb(#11) A7 Dsus4
A7 Eb(#11) F E
On Sunday morning I either sleep in or go to the church to pray for my sin.
Ev'ry few minutes find myself slippin', dreaming 'bout when the work week will begin.
Monday morning, feeling like a believer, but it's hard to get up, 'cause I'm a coffee acheiever.
Tuesday afternoon really hitting my stride, but the first half week is always such a rough ride, to...

Ch.
A F G E
Hump day
It ain't just any other slump day.
There ain't no other day like Wednesday.
And they can't take it away.
Until the clock strikes midnight on Thursday, yeah.

v.2
3X A7 Eb(#11) A7 Dsus4
A7 Eb(#11) F E
Top of the hump, I'm on top of the earth, all my co-workers can see what I'm worth.
Been a rough climb but no worse for the wear, but the rest of the week will be more than I can bear.
All my other friends talkin' 'bout Friday night, I just shake my head and say that ain't right.
The week's winding down and we're falling down fast, then we're climbing again and I hope that I'll last, until...

A F G E
Hump day
It ain't just any other slump day.
There ain't no other day like Wednesday.
And they can't take it away.
Until the clock strikes midnight on Thursday, yeah.